Living in South Africa where people do not obey the rules of the road, creates anger in drivers leading often to road rage.  The attitude of ‘When in Rome, do as the Romans do,” exasperates the situation.  Whereby more and more people ignore road markings and signs and generally do not follow the rules of the road.

Why Try To Control Other Users?

Law abiders who feel the need to control everything will attempt to control what happens on the road.  They will try their best to ensure that they show you when they believe you are in the wrong. However, all they are doing is putting themselves in danger, as well as their passengers and other people on the road.

Expressing Your Anger And Rage While Your Child Is In The Car With You

I once watched a lady coming into an intersection, where she blasted the person who was not following the rules of the road.  Watching her from the side express her rage at the driver who made her angry, I could see her anger and frustration grow as she indicated rude hand gestures to the other driver.   I then looked to the back seat of the car where a little boy aged around 4 years old was sitting in a car chair.

I see the contradiction in the safety of the car chair while she was oblivious to her actions.  She was not protecting her son from the expression of her anger for something totally unnecessary, such as road rage.

I wondered what effect this would have on her child for that day, and for his future. What was this teaching her child?  We react without thinking of the effect on ourselves and on those around us like our impressionable children.


Scientists have proven we are made up of energy.  We even say I love being around Joe Soap (for instance) as he has such good energy.  Or I don’t like Sally (for example) as she has such negative energy.

The child sitting in the back seat of the car inevitably picks up on this energy of anger and rage.  The child will model the parents’ behaviour.  I know this too as I was once the same with road rage.  My sons are now grown up and when they’re driving with me in the car, I have seen how they had road rage and realised that they copied it from me.  This created fear in me as I worried about a worst-case scenario.  If I knew then what I know now, I would not have had expressed any form of road rage.

Regretting Your Actions

Having clients come to me for anger management following their regrettable actions on the road, some now face legal prosecution.  Having a court case hanging over you will lead to more stress, anger, frustration and worry.  Adding to this, it costs a lot of money for lawyers fees, your time out of work, time stressing and worrying about the outcome.  As well as putting unnecessary pressure on relationships.  To avoid court, usually, a large settlement fee and counselling is the only outcome.

In order to avoid all this, before you affect your children and before you do something you may regret you can get help.  Courts and lawyers can be avoided too if you choose to admit sooner rather than later, that you have an anger issue.  To what point will you get to, until you admit you need anger management?

Your Hooter Is Not Meant As A Tool To Express Your Anger

From having road rage myself, I have now dealt with it.  I can now hold my hand on the hooter without any emotion behind it.  Hooting is meant to be used for warnings of danger.  It is not a tool meant for taking your anger out to prove a point.

Getting To Your Destination Safely

You cannot control what people do on the road.  Allow those who disobey the rules of the road to experience whatever danger they put themselves in.  It is their journey and their life, not yours.  You can only control what happens in your life.  Getting to your destination in a peaceful and safe state is more important than trying to control what people do on the road.  If we all do our part to obey the rules of the road, it can only improve with time.

Since letting go of my emotions and anger on the road, I also face much fewer instances that put me in those situations and that once created road rage.  You too can experience this through Anger Management and Transformation Coaching.  Book an appointment with me now to also experience a peaceful, happier state while driving for your own good as well as your children.  You can then enjoy your journey, and have a good day and focus on what’s most important to you.