One of many ways to fuel anger, anxiety, depression and/or low self-esteem, is to be on the receiving end of a bully.   The power and control you once had, feels as if it is lost in every aspect of your life when you are bullied.  You feel you have no say and that you are completely worthless.  Your self-esteem is depleted and no longer believe in yourself.

You don’t feel good enough to speak to people about it because you fear being called stupid.  Or fear to be told it was your fault and you deserve to be treated that way.  So you keep quiet and the pain builds up within you like a ticking time bomb.  You, or anyone, were not trained emotionally to cope with the ugly and the bad that you don’t like to hear.

In doing the research I found that most information regarding bullying is related to young children but not adults.  It is understandable because this is where bullying starts and is extensive worldwide in schools.

However, bullying is not spoken about as much in adulthood and how it also affects adults.  It would seem as if you are an adult now, and therefore you are expected to handle this yourself. However, it can be just as damaging to you whether you are an adult or a child.

What Bully’s Do:

People will bully their partner in order to get their own way.  They use bullying to manipulate a situation wanting only a desired outcome for them.   Bully’s use and abuse their power to make you feel unsafe, insecure and useless.  They abuse you emotionally to make you feel that you are less than nothing.  You walk on eggs around them as they display their tempers to scare you.    By either entertaining their bullying or feeling weaker in the moment, you only give them more power to a bully.  Ignoring them takes away their power.  No one has the right to hurt you or make you feel unsafe.

If you recognise the behavior of a bully in your life, take the step and:

  • Talk to someone you trust, tell them everything;
  • Stop taking the abuse, you are worth more than what they have to say;
  • Remove yourself out of the situation where possible to get help;
  • Never stay silent, speak up. If you are afraid then speak to someone who is trained to help;
  • Stop caring what people think of you. You come first;
  • Stop suffering in silence and transform your life;

You Can Rise Above A Bully:

In everything bad, there is also something good.  Once you are out of the situation, build yourself up again and find the good.  Freud said, ‘it’s not what happens to us in life but how we interpret what happens to us’. Everything that happens to us, happens for a reason.  People like Dan Pena who boasts a net worth of 50 billion pounds, was bullied as a child. But he confirmed in an interview in London Real, that it made him who he is today.

Therefore you can change your perception and stop being the victim.  You can use it to your advantage.  Review how this has driven you to do positive things in your life, which is one way of amending your perception.

Another way to change your perception is to change your own belief systems of yourself.  Stop believing what this bully is saying to you or has said to you.  Believe in yourself, believe in your strengths.  Love yourself, have confidence in what you do.  Review where you have shown these qualities in your life before and know that these qualities are still within you.   They are there you just have to see them again, believe that you own these qualities in order to change your perception of who you are.

Transformation coaching can relieve the pain from being bullied. The programs are designed to lift your confidence, believe in yourself again.  The anger will turn to acceptance.  Detach from anxiety and depression, it no longer serves you.  You deserve a better life.  If you are serious about investing in you and transforming your life, call me now to book your free session.