Wanting what you want along with a fight, struggle or spitefulness is a sure way to create trauma, disconnection, and chaos in your life, where I as a Life Coach in Johannesburg can transform all the latter, that causes further struggle. Chaos often stems from choosing to fight rather than opting for peace within yourself. People may argue, “But peace gets you nowhere.” However, this is a misconception. When you choose peace, you can still achieve what is meant for you. It may not come in the exact way you envisioned, but does that really matter?
The real question is whether the goal itself is more important than how you achieve it. Are you seeking to accomplish something meaningful, or are you more focused on proving a point, showing someone up, or acting out of spite? At what point do you recognize that fighting is causing more harm than good—adding stress and emotional strain to your life?
I want it my way
Do you notice that when you insist on having things your way, it often leads to stress, conflict, or emotional hurt? This happens because of a lack of trust or faith in the process. Instead of allowing events to unfold naturally, you may try to control the outcome by focusing on ‘how’ to make it happen. However, pursuing your goals shouldn’t feel like a constant battle. If you choose to engage in conflict, you’ll inevitably face struggle and resistance.
Fighting is usually an internal struggle that may relate to one or more of the following:
- Wanting control
- Are you being influenced or manipulated?
- Lies, dishonesty and a lack of integrity
- Fear of failure
- Fear of the unknown
- Using coping mechanisms you think work for you
- Inner child that still only knows to throw tantrums
- Anger and rage
It’s important to shift your focus from controlling every detail to trusting the process. Doing so allows you to navigate challenges more easily and reduce unnecessary stress.
Internal Or External Fight
Many of us seek peace, yet we often feel the need to fight to achieve what we desire. However, fighting can be destructive and exhausting, draining significant energy. We feel compelled to fight for to have it our way because we lack trust—both in the natural flow of life and in the belief that things will work out. We convince ourselves that we can control outcomes better than simply allowing them to unfold.
When you want something from someone and they refuse to give it, the only person you’re truly hurting is yourself. This can lead to feelings of revenge or spite, which ultimately prevents you from attaining your goals in a healthy, fulfilling way. Even if you do succeed by fighting, the process will be fraught with struggle and emotional pain.
True conflict should be reserved for a meaningful cause, not merely to impose your will. Fighting for a worthy purpose can bring a deeper sense of peace and satisfaction, unlike the stress and turmoil of fighting just to get your way.
Peace Witin And Peace Without
When you learn to trust and let go, you’ll often find that the universe provides what you desire, and sometimes in ways that are even better or more unexpected than you imagined—bringing excitement and fulfillment. It’s not about *how* you achieve what you want, but about achieving it in a meaningful way. The simple fact that you receive what you’ve asked for is enough to foster deep gratitude.
As you set intentions, the path to your goals will naturally unfold. However, it’s easy to lose sight of your true intention when obstacles arise. You may get overwhelmed by negative thoughts, emotions, or the challenges in front of you, causing you to forget the original purpose behind your desires. This internal conflict can lead to confusion, making your wants and needs shift along the way. But once you’ve made it through the chaos, you may look back and realize, “I lost track of my original intention.” This highlights the importance of staying aligned with your true purpose and keeping your focus on the bigger picture, even during moments of uncertainty.
Choosing peace allows you to bypass trauma, anger, chaos, spitefulness or disconnection and regret. Instead move forward without the unnecessary burden of conflict, bringing a sense of calm and clarity that fighting can never provide. If however you still find it difficult I, as a Life Coach in Johannesburg, can show you techniques that have long-lasting effects.
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